Fathers and Daughters - My feelings when listening to Kelly Clarkson's Piece by Piece

I was watching Kelly Clarkson sing "Piece by Piece" and started crying. That song touched me very deeply, like I know it did for a lot of women.

My father left when I was eight years old and was barely a part of my life again until I was thirty. Now, almost 20 years later I'm his 24/7 caregiver. He suffers from Alzheimer's and when the time came I stepped up and made the commitment to care for him. He's my father. I love him and I forgive him. That doesn't negate the fact that I grew up essentially fatherless. I was abandoned, and yes there are issues that come from those hurtful feelings that I've had to deal with over the years.

My father and I were able to discuss everything well before the Alzheimer's took hold. He's a wonderful man and a great friend, but he was a lousy father. He knows that and has acknowledged it.

One day I was especially exhausted, having spent the day out to doctors, and generally taking care of him without a break. I thought about how I have done more for this man in the past four years than he's done for me in almost fifty. It saddened me. We both missed out on what could have been a beautiful relationship. What we have now is more of a caregiver/patient relationship. Partly because of how difficult it is to be a caregiver for a parent, so I need to take a step away from being his daughter both emotionally and mentally in order to care for him in the best way he needs.

Listening to this song got me thinking that the man that renewed my faith in fathers was my brother. He is a wonderful father. He gives his sons the love and emotional nourishment that him and I never received. My father agrees. I wonder how it feels for him, seeing through his son and grandsons what he could have had. We've past the point in the Alzheimer's of my being able to ask him and trust his answer. I do know that he sees it. Even before the Alzheimer's he's always commented on what a great father my brother is.

A true musicians philosophy

 

“Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.”
                                                                               - Theodore Roosevelt

 

Rediscovering The Osmond Brothers

I was going through some music for an upcoming wedding that I'll be DJing and got caught up in some great old songs: Stevie Wonder - "For Once in My life", The Beatles - "Something", Dusty Springfield - "You Don't Have to Say You Love Me", Percy Sledge - "When a Man Loves a Woman" just to name a few.

Then I came across The Osmond Brothers remake of the Temptations "I Can't Get Next To You." Now those that know me know that I was a huge Osmond fan growing up from about ages 9 through 14. Listening to this song some 30 plus years later I really enjoyed it.



I then found myself getting reacquainted with some of the other Osmond Brothers songs from the early 70's. Most people know the teeny bopper songs from Donny & Marie but the brothers wrote songs that leaned more towards rock-n-roll than teen idol. Teen idol was not what they had wanted for themselves.

In an interview with all the brothers back around 2000-2001 they spoke about how the decision to do the Donny and Marie Show ruined any potential to go back to the career that they had all wanted.
Here's that piece of that interview:

(More of the interview below)

Here are some of the songs they wrote back then: 

This song tends to shock people when they find out it's the Osmonds.



This next song was also a favorite of mine. It was a huge hit in England.



This one is live.



And here's more of that interview for those of you who may be interested. It's a nice insight into the brothers. Also, they show their talented vocals and harmonies with a little impromptu vocal exercise.

When did we stop listening to albums?

Has anyone else noticed that in the 70's we listened to albums and today we listen to songs? I'm not sure what that means, or says about the music of today, but it's made me curious. I'm listening to Boston, the full album and I realized I don't normally do that anymore. I have playlists with favorite songs.

Has anyone else notice that? Anyone over 40 that is. Did we change or did the music change? Or is it the difference between record players and digital? Yet, I used to make cassette tapes in the 80's & 90's of my favorite songs - my playlists, if you will - so was it truly the way albums, in particular rock albums, were made/written in the 70's?

There are albums by Boston, Rush, Styx, Billy Joel and more that I can still sit and listen to from beginning to end. Yet I haven't actually bought a CD, let alone sit and listen to a whole CD in years. I download individual songs. So what's the difference? Me or the music?

I don't have an answer. I'm just putting it out there.



Some albums I can still listen to from beginning to end:

Boston - self titled
Rush - 2112, Moving Pictures (technically not 70's. Released in 1980)
Billy Joel - 52nd Street
Styx - Crystal Ball, Pieces of Eight (links are not to full albums)
Van Halen - self titled
Fleetwood Mac - Rumours